All day staring at the ceiling
Making friends with shadows on my wall
All night hearing voices telling me that
I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good
Hold on feeling like I’m heading for a
Break down and I dunno why
I’m not crazy
I’m just a little unwell
I know right now you can’t tell
But stay awhile and maybe then You’ll see
A different side of me
Yep, it’s one of those days; a day where the struggle to battle depression and homesickness gets harder and harder. Being prone to strong bouts of depression is not a good thing to bring to a major life change like the cross-global move I just did. Some days it’s a struggle to get out of bed, others it’s not so bad. But I had been making some progress on the ‘trying-to-keep-upbeat’ front, mainly ever since re-starting this blog. I guess having a sense of purpose helps. But then yesterday my husband ‘accidentally’ reset my IPhone and I lost all the photos on it that I was working on for today’s post. Which means I subsequently lost it too. I got so mad and sad, it’s unnerving. I know I’m blowing things out of proportion but I just can’t pull myself above water again. And there is one person to blame for all this; the radio
The radio has not been helping. I usually listen to a lite FM station at home; mainly old and popular upbeat songs that will be fine for the kids to listen and dance to. Their tag-line even reads ‘The feel good station’. But they have definitely not been helping me feel good this morning. Playing songs like Matchbox’s Unwell (above) has been pulling me under even more. And it’s all because of that darn radio.
Yes, I’m petty and small and blaming the radio. After all, isn’t that better than blaming my husband?